Glavine Avoids Sneezing, Deer Meat For 22 Years

On April 18, Mets pitcher Tom Glavine was placed on the 15-day Disabled List with a strained hamstring. No big deal, pitchers go on the DL all the time for anything from “tenderness” in their elbows to blisters on their fingers.

But when I saw this phrase crawl across the Bottom Line on ESPN, my jaw nearly hit the floor: “First time on DL in 22-year career.”

Yes, the 42-year old Cy Young Award winner most known for his glory days in the Braves’ rotation of the mid-90s had NEVER been on the DL before. To show how remarkable a feat this actually is, I decided to look up just what kind of injuries send players to the DL. I stumbled across this list of sports injuries, and I’m sure you’ll be just as amazed as I was that Glavine has managed to avoid them for 22 years.

Some highlights:

#6 – Glenallen Hill, one of the most powerful men in the history of Major League Baseball, falls through a glass table in the midst of a nightmare about spiders.

#5 – Rockies rookie shortstop Clint Barmes breaks his collar bone after overestimating the amount of frozen deer meat he could carry down a flight of stairs. (If he had ever played Oregon Trail, he would know that if you kill 100 pounds of meat, you can only carry 20 pounds back.)

#4 – Cubs slugger Sammy Sosa strains a ligament in his back after a violent sneeze. So that’s why people say “Bless You” afterwards.

This one didn’t make the list, but is certainly worth mentioning: Volatile and outspoken outfielder Milton Bradley, while playing for the San Diego Padres, tears his ACL while arguing with an umpire (video of injury starts about 35 seconds in).

 So hats off to Glavine for managing to steer clear of imaginary arachnids, venison, airborne allergens, and managerial restraints. However, since he does play in New York, I wouldn’t be surprised to see a “sewer rat-related injury” in his near future.


2 Responses to Glavine Avoids Sneezing, Deer Meat For 22 Years

  1. sheepy712 says:

    You forgot my favorite one: John Smoltz burned his chest while ironing a shirt that he was wearing and missed a start.

    I found this page that had a few good ones too:

  2. Veda Ward says:

    Lucky me to have such a talented writer in the family. Since I’m allergic to everything, this has provided some insights as to how to use up some of that extra sick leave! So Cal isn’t much better than NYC, and I am prewtty sure I am now allergic to coyotes, owls and the underside dander of red hawks’ hind leg feathers. I am also allergic to some of the neighbors (smiles) and hand sanitizer. More importantly, an occupational hazard has turned into an allergy to paper and red ink…..Oh my!

    I don’t get the lack of author identity on this blog. Where are you?? …Clue me in!

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